Gregory Crewdson

Gregory Crewdson, a SUNY Purchase alumni, is a photographer who excites me for shooting digitally in classes next semester so I can experiment more with color. His use of color is admirable and really help set the mood of the cinematic images that he produces. Gregory Crewdson, Malery Marder, Diane Arbus and Philip Lorcia diCorcia all have dramatic photographs that speak for themselves and stand strong on their own. But I admire the suspense that Gregory Crewdson leaves us with with our photographs. Gregory Crewdson stages his photographs and display a cinematic story of suburban homes and lifestyle and the families that live in them. His photographs are cinematic and dramatic and his use of colors definitely help emphasize that. I guess what most attracts me about Crewdson and Philip Lorcia diCorcia is not that they stage their work, but the fact that they're so powerful and convincing. Crewdson's photographs have this deep blue color throughout all of them that sets the mood of the photograph but keeps you hanging, wishing that you could see a photograph of what happens next. He gives you so little but just enough to keep you engaged. He really has a perfect balance of not giving you too much information and manages to keep the viewer craving more. He captures the moment right before or even right after all hell breaks loose, but it's totally at the right moment.

He captures a scene that seems as if you are driving through a neighborhood and it gives you a feeling that you are spying on this intimate moment.

He stirs up the questions, " what happened?" and "what's going to happen?" just through one image, and that's impressive. He gives an erie vibe and sets up a scenario almost that you're walking into it. 

With my last roll of film, I tried setting up a scene that seems as if you are walking into someone else's problem.  I was going on a hike with my boyfriend and best friend and we had to park on this busy highway. I thought about how many people were passing by us, and what they must think of us just parking on the side of the highway. I then walked across the highway and didn't tell them what I was doing. I wanted to set up a scene, but they're both camera shy so I just had to do it in a way where they know I'm up to something that may come off as dangerous, to get a discomfort emotion stirring, and I screamed over from the other side, " can you pop the lid of my car? Jeff did and I told Alana to get in the drivers seat and then to get up, and I captured that moment directly as a car was passing by to try and capture that everyone is going through something, even strangers. 

It's a start. I'm exploring different ways of directing to capture a similar feeling that Gregory Crewdson is trying to express. I'm getting to know my subjects and evaluating what they're capable of giving me and how to get them to give me what I want in a photograph. 

This was the first moment where I wanted to step back from my subject, including more of the setting in my photographs and I can see myself learning from these photographers. I am thinking more about the relationship between my subjects and my setting rather than just the people I'm photographing. I need to keep stepping back to better understand my subjects and their relationship on the grounds they're standing on.

Motels

After looking at Philip Lorcia diCorcia’s work, I have came to the conclusion that I have to better place my subjects in a more fitting environment if I want to stage my photographs. I haven’t thought of myself as a director, but I am going to have to develop and incorporate the mindset of a director to my photography to capture the psychological aspect of what goes on beneath the surface of a human. I know whether or not my photographs are captured at the right time, but capturing the right place is my current side project as well as well as being able to better portray the psychological aspect.

            During my photo critique on Thursday, I was told to research a few photographers, one of them being Malerie Marder.  In one of Malerie’s Exhibitions, Blain Southern, she says,  “I used to have anxiety about my pictures exposing things too private, but the real intimacies are censored out. I still get pangs of self-consciousness, but it’s too late for regret. What was I thinking when I made the pictures? This is in no particular order: fate, kink, performance, a secret, nostalgia, sensual memory, voyeurism, nighttime settings, barren rooms, stark lighting, romantic trysts, foreign environments, intimacy, lack of intimacy, connection, lack of connection, self-reflection, lack of self-reflection, awkwardness, isolation, random, purpose, shadow, vulnerability, immaturity, innocence, amorous bodies, ambiguity, cocoons of emotion, modernist architecture, transience, lurid smells, a patient’s sickbed, love, eroticism, clarity, blushing, bruised, family, boyfriends, conflict, loyalty, disapproval, neuroticism, narcissism, truculence, numbness, sexual discomfort, subconscious, and the past. None of it is relevant now.”

I will say that as a photographer, I know exactly what my problems and struggles are. It’s not that I am unaware of my weaknesses, it’s more of a problem of overcoming them.  Since I want to stage photographs that are about what people are going through and what they are struggling with, I like to work with people I am close with, and try to depict what they’re going through in life, by photographing. It’s difficult for me because I don’t want to offend them by showing too much or falsely showing something. I am so scared of this and Malerie Marder makes a good point that this fear is irrelevant. I just need to keep telling myself that getting the photograph I want and need is very important and the people that are closest to me and the people who are willing to work with me shouldn’t be offended or get upset.I also would like to find more models that aren’t embarrassed to be put on the spot other than three of my exotic friends.


Looking at Philip Lorcia diCorcia’s work, I became aware of the fact that I need to better locate my subjects, but Malerie Marder has opened my eyes to photographing in motels as a more specific setting. She often goes to pay by the hour motels for some of her shots, which is something I’ve never thought about and am definitely interested in once I get a little more money. Motels are we people go when they are kicked out of the house, traveling, visiting, need to get away, and other temporary reasons. Looking at her work, I thought more about motel rooms, and motels freak me out a bit. They are very erie, I mean, think about how many people have slept in that bed before you? Yes they change the sheets, but think about all of the things that have gone on in that room that you won't even know about? It's the exact same concept of what I am trying to capture in people. It's the idea of not knowing what goes on beneath the surface and figuring it out and breaking it down. I want that erie feeling a photograph can give off. Dramatic, suspenseful, and slightly unanswered is exactly what I want. A college dorm has the same concept I guess, but It’s hard to photograph in a dorm at school because it just isn’t convincing. I guess I just want to find a high light setting, that's homier than a college dorm, but has an erie feel to it while working with models who aren't afraid to express themselves. 

I was recently introduced to Philip Lorcia diCorcia's work  and he is definitely a photographer I want to become more familiar with. I really can relate to the way he sets up his photographs with his family and friends, rather than making them with a stranger. It's not that I don't appreciate the way Diane Arbus is able to make such a powerful photograph by becoming comfortable with strangers, because I am so drawn to her work. Her photographs hold such power, while Philip Lorcia diCorcia's work is very magical. Although photographing strangers is something I definitely think I should become more comfortable with, I love working with people I am close with, and I love staging my photographs. I love the way diCorcia sets up a situation with his familiar subject to make it look like he is photographing a stranger. I never really thought about photographing family and friends this way and I really think it might answer a lot of problems I've been running into lately.  I feel like since I am using people that I'm familiar it almost looks too staged, but I am staging my photographs, and I am using people that I know really well. I'm often having a hard time staging them in a way that it doesn't looked too staged. I've been interested in setting up situations to portray what someone might be feeling internally but in a dreamy fantastical way, and I think that diCorcia's work is exactly that. Philip Lorcia diCorcia works with documentary photography in a theatrical way. I want combine the the psychological and theatrical by fact and fiction. I think he does this in such a way that it's almost impossible to tell that it's set up. I think that he just directs his subject to express the right amount of emotion for the setting he places them in.  Looking at diCorcia's work has made me more aware of the connection between subject and location when it comes to setting up a photograph and I know that my understanding will only develop more as I become more familiar with him. I definitely want to pick my locations more consciously and carefully.

I can really appreciate the way diCorcia combines the formal and conceptual aspects of photographing. I've also been inspired by Diane Arbus for a good amount of time now, and I have felt that all this time, I've been attempting to capture the same power as she does, but I need to apply her power, in my own style. The point of becoming accustomed with well known photographers isn't to adopt their style, it's to be inspired by it. It's to look at multiple artists, their photographs, understand them, see how they think, and take what we get from their work and applying it to our own. Recently, I've found a few photographers, including diCorcia's work, that have recently changed my way of thinking about photography and have helped me better understand the problems I've been facing as an artist.  I don't have to photograph strangers just because I'm drawn to Arbus' work. I'm allowed to stage my photographs and there is nothing wrong with that, as long as I'm convincing. Since I've been here at Purchase, I've gotten this feeling that staging my photographs was wrong. I don't know if that's because last year I felt very disconnected to my teacher or our styles were completely different, but she gave me the impression that photographing people I'm close with and people that are my age is frowned upon.
I felt maybe she didn't understand what I was trying to do or where I was coming from, but the point of art is to expressing yourself by understanding and giving your view on a situation. I felt like my point of view was wrong because I was staging my photographs, so I thought "she's my teacher so she must be right", but maybe I wasn't expressing it in a convincing way or maybe we just didn't see eye to eye. Maybe I need to be more convincing with what I am trying to express. Philip Lorcia diCorcia opened up a light that I'm allowed to do whatever I want as a photographer, as long as I make it as compelling as possible.

I have only been seriously photographing for about three years now. I've been forming a method over the years, but that doesn't mean I haven't been open to new ways of photographing. I will say, my interest in photographing people has only grown stronger. I thouroughly enjoy learning about all different types of people and their relationship to the world, and my relations to them. I have ventured into landscapes, but photographing people is more appealing to me. I like setting up portraits that best describe a person. There are times where I have a clear cut vision of what I want my photograph to look like, but if we can picture it, why even photograph it? Mostly, I like collaborating with my subject. I believe in most situations, it's important to see what the person you are photographing is capable of. Of course, I then structure it and capture how I view the person I'm photographing.  If I don't have a strong relationship with my subject, this helps me establish a relationship. This develops a level of comfort which I think is the most important thing between a photographer and his or her subject. I want to set up photographic situations that portray the psychological aspect of an individual. I have been familiarizing myself with Diane Arbus' work all semester. I love how she photographs people that are socially abnormal, but captures them in such a powerful way. She stops us in real life to look at a photograph, a moment that has passed. They are such strong images, that the viewer must look at them. I also am interested in Justine Kurland. I want to incorporate both styles of photography into the rest of this semester. I love the fantastical aspect that Justine Kurland incorporates into her photographs and the psychological aspect diane Arbus incorporates in her photographs. I love the way Arbus captures someone in their natural state of being. She tells the truth through her photographs, but I love the way Justine captures the dreamy aspect of something.

I recently checked out Diane Arbus' book "Revelations" from the library. Not only has this helped me get a better understanding of Arbus' work, but I was able to see what her contact sheets looked like. In some of her contact sheets, she takes multiple photographs of subjects in the same composition but different emotions in each frames. In other contact sheets, there are about three frames per subject and then it's on to the next subject matter. The book shows different approaches of how she photographs although the subject is consistent. I really admire that because I am still figuring out different ways of photographing when using film since it is much more valuable than digital. 

As I said in my last blog post, I have been planning out this photograph I want to make that was inspired by Justine Kurland's artist lecture. I have started collecting a bunch of baby dolls that I want to place around the woods and create a similar world that Justine Kurland has created for the teenage girl run away world. Instead of making it seem like a peaceful and fearless world, I want to show how horrible it could be. I want to show how the girls who run away might actually feel. I am going to make the dolls really dirty and broken up because dolls are usually like a security blanket. The dolls will represent the girls who ran away and are just as broken as they are.  I want to show the psychological, fantastical world that is inspired by these two artists. I am not sure if I want to make a series of photograph of this particular theme or just a photograph that fits in a more general theme. 

Justine Kurland

When I was about eight years old, I packed a sleeping bag, a tooth brush and a bottle of water and stormed out of my house. It was the first and only time I ran away and I don't even remember why, but even though I was being rebellious, I was scared. I wanted to show my mom I could live on my own, but what I really wanted was for my mom to chase after me. Fear was something that I do remember feeling when I ran away. I feel like every young girl thinks about running away but is too scared, or actually tries running away in fear, but Justine portrays the young and rebellious teenage girl in a care free, fantastical way.

Justine Kurland narrates the fantastical aspect of rebellious teenage girls and her photograph gave me such nostalgia. She set up and photographed the teenage girl run away scene in the perspective of the girls themselves. These young girls are free and fearless and don't seem to be influenced by their parents one bit. They live in a fantastical, care free perfect girl world. As we grow older, we lose that vulnerable feeling, but the way Justine constructs her narrative photograph, allowed me to feel that once again. I always think of childhood, but being able to feel that feeling just by a single photograph is magical. The way she combines the fantastical and reality is breath taking. 

Another thing I admire about Justin is how her photography and her life collide. They really influence each other and become one, especially when she had her son. It really shows her tenacity and I think that is one of the strongest traits as a photographer. She talked about risky things she has done while photographing to get the photograph she wants. She talked about this one guy who basically verbally harassed her for years. She spent years leaving him for his vulgarity, but always managed to find her way back to him. I really do admire her curiosity and tenacity. Justine works in a way that I've never really seen before. What I really enjoyed at the artist lecture was the fact that she didn't just tell you about her work, she explained it in a way to make you feel what she was feeling. Hearing Justine talk about her photographic process was captivating. Her photographs don't need explanation and stand very strong on their own, but hearing her thought process was inspiring and I'm glad that I was viewing the photographs for the first time while listening to her speak about them. I definitely want to see where I can go with the fantasical aspect of young girls.

I also really enjoyed her photographic series after she had her son. I love how she incorporated her son's interest in trains into her photographs. I liked her perfect girl world series better because it's more like my style, but I really did appreciate how she managed to balance her son and her work as much as she possibly could. I think there were some situations where she was a bit obsessive, like when she mentioned how she threw her son over a fence, but it only shows how truly dedicated to her work she really is.

Justine Kurland is definitely an artist that I'm very inspired by. An idea that I had after her artist lecture was based off of the run away girls. I want to collect a whole bunch of baby dolls and strategically place them in the woods around one girl. Of course, this idea is very vague, but it's something that came to mind after seeing Justine's work. 

Death Comes in Three's.

The first three weeks of this semester have been too surreal. It's been a crazy start. I've looked forward to school since summer started. Two days after I got back to Purchase, I found out my good friend wasn't coming back because he passed away suddenly. There is nothing worse than hearing someone young, your age has passed away. I'm the kind of person who needs to keep busy to preoccupy myself and prevent myself from getting into a funk. So I kept busy for the rest of the week. I get a call from my dad at the end of the week that my aunt had passed away. It was the second week in a row that I had to call out of work for a death related incident. I haven't experienced many deaths in my life so two in a row is a big deal for me. But of course, life doesn't work in ways we understand, the following week, the third week of first semester, I had to put my dog down. Anyone who knows me, knows that Peewee was the light of my life and that this was the hardest thing for me to do, ever. Life doesn't stop so I couldn't either. I spent all week looking at current events. This project was particularly challenging for me. Everything on the news seems so negative and depressing. I ended up choosing an article about a Florida police officer running over a man named Marlon Brown. Marlon ran away from the cop when he was pulled over for not wearing a seatbelt. Him running away from the cop led to the cop driving around, chasing him and running him over, killing him. The whole incident was recorded by the dashboard camera in the patrol car. The family settled for $500,000 dollars in court, which meant the cop wasn't getting jail time. After they settled on this agreement, the family ended up releasing the video of the cop running Marlon Brown over. They felt it wasn't fair and the family wanted justice. 

I went to the thrift shop and bought an old TV for five dollars that I wanted to use to represent the video of the cop.  I went to photograph my television in this open field and on the walk there, I had a mental break down. Through out the three weeks, I didn't give myself time to take a break.  I had finally hit my point and had too much on my mind. I sat down on the side of the road and just cried because I needed to. All I could think of the past week was the last moments I got to share with my dog. I was in the room when the vet put her down and I kept replaying this memory over and over.  I finally realized that my response to this current event was right in front of me. Death is  crazy and numbing. It's something I don't understand and I don't think many people do. I could never imagine having a family member's death on video. My goal of this project was to show the emotional aspects of someone dealing with death. The video on the police's dashboard holds so much weight emotionally. It's in the perspective of the cop, and it's the last moment of Marlon Brown's life. I wanted to show what the family must be going through, since the news only talks about the actions that take place.

http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2013/09/19/family-of-fla-man-run-over-by-police-car-calls-for-ex-cop-to-be-charged/

September 18th

" If I like many photographers, and I do, I account for this by noting a quality they share- Animation. They may or may not make a living by photography, but they are alive by it. "

When taking a successful photograph, you must live through it. Not in the way that your name lives on, but your experience. If there is no "animation", what is the point of the photograph?  We photograph to capture, to remember, to simply tell a story. To me, one of the most important aspects of a photograph is that it couldn't be taken by anyone else, and if it could be, how would you photograph it differently than through the eyes of another photographer? As Robert Adams says in the beginning of the reading, " Your own photography is never enough. Every photographer who has lasted has depended on other people's pictures too-" It is important to be influenced by other photographers and artists, but what are you contributing to your own photograph that makes it different and your own? If we continue to create things that have already been created, then what is the point? I believe the point of photographing is to show your perspective and point of view on a given situation. My goal as a photographer is to share my experience with my viewer, and maybe they won't feel the same way as I feel, but my intention is to leave them with any feeling as long as it's just as strong as my own, whether they agree or not. 

Something I've been doing recently is making rules for myself before photographing. I'm still trying to figure out if this makes photographing easier or harder as of right now, but I know it will definitely help me improve as a photographer. I think it will help me develop a better understanding and more clarity of what I am capable of. One main goal is to step out of my comfort zone which is something that Robert Adams mentions in the reading when he refers to his friend driving through the sun roof of his car and driving with his feet. Of course, this wouldn't be my literal idea of stepping out of my comfort zone, but I definitely think that when a photographer takes risks, they are able to make a stronger photograph. Recently, I just asked Cadisha, a girl that I graduated with to photograph her. I was extremely nervous because we weren't really friends, all I knew about her is that she has Hodgkin's Lymphoma, a type of cancer. This was something that I would never do a few months ago. It was not until I was introduced to Diane Arbus' work that I was inspired to create photographs of people that were out of my comfort zone, rather than photographing family and close friends.

This was the first time in my life that the experience of photographing, the process that lead me to my photograph, was just as riveting as the outcome of my photograph. I'm not saying I haven't been moved by the process of photographing, but there was something different when I was photographing Cadisha. I was not only proud of myself, but honored to be photographing such a beautiful person that I wouldn't have known if I didn't go out of my way to ask if I could photograph her.

Dru Donovan

When you look at a photograph made by Dru Donovan, questions immediately rise. You don't just sit there are say, " oh it's just three men getting extremely intimate and the two men on the outside are kissing the man in the middle's neck!"  "Just" is not a word that is used in the process of describing one of Dru Donovan's photos. She not only takes an idea and digs deep with it, but she presents it in such a way that more questions are asked by the viewer than answered. I think that's what Dru accomplishes best in her photos. Not only does she capture an intimiate situation in a remarkable way, but usually she is a third ( or fourth or fifth) party looking into a scene, which as the viewer of the photograph can gives off an odd vibe. It's not every day you see three men of different race openly kissing, but also, are comfortable enough to do it in front of a camera.

Not only is it conceptually appealing, but visually appealing as well. The choice of clothing of the darker man on the right is just perfect and is complimented by the wooden rails. As much as the subject matter can be uncomfortable to some viewers, it is so pleasing to look at. She captures something that might be considered " socially unacceptable" and makes it beautiful. I can't stop looking at it. I've looked at this photo for so long just admiring it's unique sense of beauty. It seems to me that Dru plans out the outfit's that people are wearing in her photographs, or at least making it seem purposeful which I think is extremely important.

The way she has the passed out boy in the middle, wearing stripes, works so well. This has potential to be a juvinial photo of someone just photographing a teenage scene, but the way she uses clothing, or positions the people in the particular clothing, shows how thought out this photo is. The two outside figure's attention is on the " middle man" in both photos. I really admire Dru's use of dense dark background in this photo. I think if the background in the first photograph was dark, it wouldn't be as strong, but i'm glad that she made that choice in this photo.
Dru takes intimate situations, and exploits it, just as she does in the photo of someone being manicured.
We over look something like a manicure being intimate, but the way she captures it from an areal view, makes it a much more bizarre concept. The photo changes the subject from a manicure to a photo about touch and intimacy, which is something I've never really thought about.